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Tip: At times we should be like Bella and other times we should be like Grace!

Tip of the Week
04/15/13

Tip: At times we should be like Bella and other times we should be like Grace!

I have entered the stage in life of having grandchildren.  For those of you who have joined me, you certainly know what I am talking about when I tell you how much fun and how amazing they are!  I can still remember my father saying to me, “Robert, if I had known how wonderful grandchildren were, I would have had them first!”

Of my six grandchildren, four are boys and two are girls.  Since I have four daughters of my own, I think I am a little extra sweet on my granddaughters, Bella and Grace.  They are fascinating to watch, partly because they are two of the most different children I have ever seen in my life.  Let me share a story with you that will illustrate my point.

On the Saturday before Easter, several of my family gathered for lunch at a nearby Chick-fil-A restaurant.  Since it was a holiday weekend, the restaurant was very crowded and the lines were long.

As in many other fast-food restaurants, the children’s meal come with a prize inside and Chick-fil-A allows children to trade in their prize for an ice cream cone at the end of their meal.  So, after lunch, both Bella and Grace decided they would like to exchange their prize for a cone.  With prize in hand, they headed up to the counter.  As I said, the restaurant was packed and there must have been ten to fifteen people in each line waiting to be served.

We watched as the girls approached the counter.  Bella walked around everyone who was in line and strolled right up to the counter, handed over her little book and said, “I want to turn this in for an ice cream cone!”  She was so happy!  However, she was oblivious to the fact that she had just broken in line in front of at least ten people.  I honestly don’t think she even saw that anyone else was in line; she was just ready for her ice cream cone.  Grace, on the other hand, had walked to the end of the longest line in the restaurant and was waiting patiently for her turn.  She never said a word to Bella about breaking in line.  She just quietly and patiently waited at the end of the line for her turn to get her ice cream cone.

My daughter Esther, who is Bella’s mother, said, “Isn’t it amazing that they are so different?”  Bella is extremely outgoing and Grace is more reserved.  One behavior is not right or wrong, nor is it good or bad; it is just different.  However, it becomes bad when we don’t recognize our behavior and are not in touch with what is going on in the world around us.

While it is true that Bella should have gone to the back of the line, it is also true that sometimes in life it is important to step up to the front of the line.  Sometimes we need to step up and make things happen as Bella did, and other times we need to step to the end of the line and let things happen as Grace did.  Wisdom comes in knowing which action to take at what time.  Both are very different, but both are also important.

This is one of the mysteries of life – knowing when to go to the front of the line and when to go to the back of the line; when to make things happen and when to let things happen; when to try to bring about the desired results that you are seeking in your life, or when to simply take your hands off and let whatever happens take place at its normal time.

If you look at your own life and behavior this week, you will see that you are constantly trying to find the balance between those two extremes.  If you are a lot like Bella, then I applaud your desire to get ahead in life.  All of us should be like that at times.  But, if you are like Grace, then I applaud you, too.  Your kind, patient ways will cause others to take notice of you and good things will happen at the appointed time.  But, don’t be stuck on stuck!  Don’t simply have the attitude that things in life are the way they are because that’s the way they are supposed to be and you have no other choices.  The truth of the matter is that sometimes you need to speak up and say something and other times you need to be quiet and say nothing.  The real balance and wisdom in life comes in knowing when to do what at the appropriate time.

I hope all of you have some Bella in your personality and I hope all of you have some Grace in you as well.  Learning when to be outgoing and when to be more reserved can bring you a lot of success and personal fortune in your life if you know how to do the appropriate behavior at the appropriate time for the appropriate reason.  My grandchildren are teaching me that every time I am with them!

Tip: At times we should be like Bella and other times we should be like Grace!

Have a great week!  God bless you! 04
Dr. Robert A. Rohm

Robert Rohm

Top selling author and speaker, Robert Rohm Ph.D. is founder of Personality Insights Inc. and The Robert Rohm Co. As you will see, Dr. Rohm specializes in helping people better understand themselves and others.

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